PerfectIt

Here is an exchange of Facebook messages and emails with Daniel Heuman, CEO & Founder of Intelligent Editing Ltd.

Twitter: http://twitter.com/intelligentedit
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/PerfectItSoftware

I posted my first impression using the contact link:

I just tested PerfectIt and sent them some feedback. It reads:
This is not a request for support, just feedback. I tested your app and found it to be a complete waste of time. It appears to be totally incapable of distinguishing between simple successions of words like "armour plated" in "the ship is armour plated" and qualifiers like "armour-plated" in "an armour-plated ship". Utterly useless. You don't appear to have worked out the difference between grammar and consistency.

PerfectIt CEO Daniel Heuman responded promptly saying:

Thanks for looking at PerfectIt. I'm sorry it's not for you.

On that error, our philosophy is that human beings make the best decisions about grammar and language, and they always will. So the software doesn't try to check grammar. Instead, it shows possible errors and leaves everything up to the user. So you're absolutely right. It won't understand the difference between "armour-plated" and "armour plated" in that context. However, it has an onscreen warning about adjectival compounds so that users know to look out for it. The only alternative would be to have the software check it. Would you really trust a machine to understand differences in grammar and language?
As I say, I'm sorry we couldn't win your business. It sounds like you have a deep understanding of grammar, so I would have hoped that you'd really like the philosophy behind the program. We're always working to reduce the false positives it shows, so I hope you'll consider us again in a few years.
Best wishes,

I followed up with:

For my first test, I had PerfectIt scan a highly technical text of 30,500 words (sample articles can be viewed here) containing 845 hyphens, one of which turned out to be misplaced. PerfectIt queried every single one of these plus many hundred of word strings that were not adjectival compounds. Tedious, to say the least. Your excellent reply has at least given me the urge to test other aspects. Let me add, however, that where technical writers and translators are concerned, software that pretends to check hyphen but cannot distinguish between adjectival compounds and similar strings of words in other contexts simply fails to make the cut. If I have helped you to clarify this for others that might be useful. One more point, when viewing your site and installing the software I didn't see any indication as to which languages PerfectIt can analyse.

Then with:

Daniel.
Thanks again for your prompt reply via Facebook.
I will shortly place our exchanges on my blog.
I have now corrected my inconsistent use of ‘commandos’ and 'commandoes', also ‘Scorpène’ and ‘Scorpene’, though I notice that the app wasn't able to distinguish between the singular and plural forms of this proper noun (the name of a French submarine that the manufacturer changed half way through this project in response to feedback from me which I then failed to double-check before delivering my document).

I have now been through the other checks that PerfectIt runs and, overall, was rather impressed. (see result below) It is also closer to meeting my needs than Antidote which was a huge disappointment to me despite the claims of many of my colleagues. Many of the PerfectIt checks are both thorough and well thought out even if they don't match the needs of a technical writer or translator drafting texts for specialist readerships where acronyms are used in different ways from the guidelines applicable to those writing for lay readers.

Conclusion: PerfectIt looks like a very useful tool for most writers and translators working in/into English, despite some serious limitations in the case of technical writers and into-English translators drafting for specialist readerships where acronyms are used differently from the guidelines applicable to those writing for lay readers.

PerfectIt offers one feature that Antidote does not, namely a 30-day money-back guarantee. This plus PerfectIt's free, full-scale 14-day trial are significant advantages.

Fruitful exchange

A fruitful exchange of tweets:

#1

Steve Dyson‏ @DysonSdc

Steve Dyson Retweeted TranslationTalk / Amanda

I usually use two re-readers.

Steve Dyson added,

TranslationTalk / Amanda @translationtalk

Let's talk about #collaboration from a different perspective. How many of you work in a translation partnership or team?

5:59 PM - 7 Aug 2018

#2

Steve Dyson‏ @DysonSdc 22h22 hours ago
Steve Dyson Retweeted TranslationTalk / Amanda
I usually use two re-readers.
Steve Dyson added,

Percy Balemans | Creative Translations‏ @creative_xl8

Replying to @DysonSdc @translationtalk

I read that as "two e-readers". I blame the heat...

6:02 PM - 7 Aug 2018

#3

TranslationTalk / Amanda‏ @translationtalk

Replying to @creative_xl8 @DysonSdc

Were you thinking he just proofread his work on two different tablets or the two tablets have two different style and editing software packages? Curious minds want to know.

6:06 PM - 7 Aug 2018

#4

Steve Dyson‏ @DysonSdc

Steve Dyson Retweeted Allison Wright

When I think of translation revisers (I note that this spelling is more popular than the one I usually prefer), I think of big in-house teams (many moons ago I spent a week with the OECD team) where seniors revise the work of juniors, usually very thoroughly.

Steve Dyson added,

Allison Wright @wrightbutton

I am a re-reader, employed for two of my good qualities: being naturally pernickety (What joy!) and something equally nebulous: having a "good writing style". I also have revisors scrutinising my own translations: red ink,…

3:31 PM - 8 Aug 2018

#5

Steve Dyson  @DysonSdc

Steve Dyson Retweeted Steve Dyson

My last to explain why I use 're-reader'. But I see that this is not as clear as 'reviser' even if my meaning is more restrictive in that I'm the senior asking usually younger translators to pick up on certain aspects while leaving my 'style' intact. Clearer?

Steve Dyson added,

Steve Dyson @DysonSdc

When I think of translation revisers (I note that this spelling is more popular than the one I usually prefer), I think of big in-house teams (many moons ago I spent a week with the OECD team) where seniors revise the work of juniors, usually very thoroug…

3:35 PM - 8 Aug 2018

A mandate to transcreate

I transcreate a regular technical journalism publication from French into English. The declared aim of this publication is to promote specific France-based industries. The source articles give people who read French access to in-depth news and analysis on companies, projects, products and services in the target sectors. For the English version, the editorial team selects articles of potential interest to a wider technical audience throughout Europe.

It is my job to translate while adapting the English-language content to suit the new target audience and emphasizing the positive, particularly with regard to French successes in tailoring products and services to client needs.

Where I feel a passage is likely to be of little or no interest to the target readership, I shorten or delete it. In the email accompanying my draft I explain my editorial decisions. To my mind, this is where transcreation differs from 'translation' in the normal sense.

Recently, I transcreated an article based on an interview with the CEO of an advanced technology company. The interviewee discussed recent news and the state of progress of his company's main technology among other issues of interest.

At one point, the interviewee explained why he thought the French government should subsidise his company's technology until it became cost-competitive with other technologies in the same general area.

I suggested to my client that this passage would probably have a distinctly negative impact on a large proportion of the target readership of the English version. Indeed, I felt that the passage was at odds with the declared aim of my client's publication. Because the passage was relatively long, I translated it, but suggested to the client that we delete it. After reviewing my version of the article, my client agreed with my line of argument and the passage was duly deleted.

While this is an extreme case, I think it illustrates how useful transcreation can be to a client and how much success hinges on close collaboration between transcreator and client.

My public portfolio

My public portfolio includes:

• Show 'em what you can do_#1
• Show 'em what you can do_#2, #3, #4, #5, #6, #7, #8, #9, #10, #11 and #11.1
• Transcreation, examples from an online newsletter, #5
• Transcreation, examples from an online newsletter, #4, #3, #2 and #1 
• Night jasmine
• Je vais passer pour un vieux con, #2

Feedback on any of these posts is more than welcome.

Night jasmine is an example of maritime literature, Je vais passer pour un vieux con is an example of light journalistic humour, for want of a better description, and all the other posts are transcreations, or translation/adaptations, of technical journalism from French to English.

Add a page to a public portfolio

Prospecting for new clients for your translation/transcreation services? One technique is to identify a company, product or service that you find interesting, technically within your scope and worthy of better promotion in your target language.

Here's an example of how to add a page to your public portfolio.

Here is the link to the original (in French) concerning a product that I find fascinating. The company is called SBS Interactive, the product is called Vis-On and the page I have chosen to translate and adapt is headed VIS-On : visualiser le tel que construit.

Here is my version:

Source. Translated and adapted by Steve Dyson.

************

VIS-On: “As built” visualisation

8 February 2018

Ship inspections can be difficult to organise, first because most vessels are seldom accessible and second because inspections take time. They are nevertheless essential for training, to plan and prepare maintenance and other works and to show vessels to potential clients.

SBS Interactive developed the VIS-On® enhanced visualisation system to make ships directly accessible for online inspection and interaction.

SBS Interactive applications like VIS-On® save users time and money.

Benefits

·  Remotely inspect ships and shipboard spaces using enhanced visualisation.

·  Train personnel to follow standard procedures.

·  Plan maintenance procedures and add tasks as necessary.

·  Do maintenance while compiling user-friendly manuals.

·  Prepare quotes by giving subcontractors direct remote access to relevant work spaces.

·  Improve safety by raising risk awareness and preparing for emergencies.

·  Promote products and know-how.

·  Compile visual inventories.

See equipment and spaces “as built”

Use VIS-On® enhanced visualisation software to prepare, document and share secure virtual ship inspections. VIS-On® offers far more than internet-based virtual tours developed for the general public. The package is designed for industrial use starting with secure immersive inspection tours by in-house teams or third parties.

Features

Video features include:

·  360° panoramic photos taken inside shipboard spaces

·  360° laser scans to take measurements

·  2D panoramic views of outdoor and deck areas

·  aerial views recorded by drones

·  CAD/CAM drawings, views and graphics complete with attachments for virtual navigation.

Main functions

Use VIS-On® to:

·  create immersive virtual tours of ships (360° and 2D views, drawings, and laser measurement)

·  attach files (pdfs, photos, videos, Word® documents) to 360° views

·  interact with computer-aided maintenance management (CAMM) and electronic document management (EDM) packages

·  create inspection tours focusing on training, maintenance, safety, etc.

·  share tours with authorised third parties

·  remotely access tours via internet, intranet or offline

·  search, i.e. enter keywords to find items of equipment, spaces and attachments

·  improve teamwork (add tasks, tests, inspections, etc. as necessary)

·  measure distances to within a cm

·  compile inventories using 360° photos taken before, during and after maintenance

·  store attachments in a single safe location.

********

Notes

1. Autre possibilité pour le titre: VIS -On: See it “as built” 
2. Orthographe et ponctuation (surtout des listes) selon mes préférences personnelles. Bien entendu, d’autres préférences sont possibles.
3. À supposer que SBS utilise « virtualisation enrichie » parce que c’est n’est pas la même chose que la « réalité virtuelle », j’ai traduit par « enhanced visualisation » plutôt que « virtual reality ». 
4. Dans "Maintenir en préparant l’intervention et en ajoutant des tâches", l'expression "en ajoutant des tâches" ne me semble pas très clair. Pourrait-on clarifier ou donner un exemple? 
5. CAMM & EDM: à confirmer. 
6. ‘Tasks’, ou bien ‘jobs’ ? Pourrait-on clarifier ou donner un exemple?

100k+

This blog has now logged over 100,000 hits. So, a quick word of thanks to all those who have found something of interest among my posts and a small request. Please send me any feedback that you feel appropriate. Thank you.

So what does "Make it sing" really mean?

It's a good question.
Attempts to explain what is meant usually get bogged down after just a few paragraphs.
So how about explaining the idea using examples?
Great idea, but really telling, convincing examples can be hard to find.

Good news!
Here's one that I find convincing:

This sentence has five words. Here are five more words. Five-word sentences are fine. But several together become monotonous. Listen to what is happening. The writing is getting boring. The sound of it drones. It’s like a stuck record. The ear demands some variety.
Now listen. I vary the sentence length, and I create music. Music. The writing sings. It has a pleasant rhythm, a lilt, a harmony. I use short sentences. And I use sentences of medium length. And sometimes, when I am certain the reader is rested, I will engage him with a sentence of considerable length, a sentence that burns with energy and builds with all the impetus of a crescendo, the roll of the drums, the crash of the cymbals–sounds that say listen to this, it is important.
Source: GoodReads by Gary Provost
To hear it read with aplomb, try this.

It looks and reads better with a layout that I can't readily equal using Blogger:

For information on Gary Provost (1944-1995), see here.

Next step?

Now all I need is similarly convincing examples from the worlds of technical journalism and translated technical journalism.

Any suggestions?

This tweet by Anglocom is pertinent:

Anglocom
@anglais36 minutes agoMoreA good reminder for English translators of Latin languages: “An abstract noun neither smiles nor sings nor tells bedtime stories.” (Lewis Lapham)

Exchange with FT regarding the word 'minaret'

After reading Château de Chambord: overnighting at the Loire’s grandest folly, I submitted a comment saying something along the lines (when I tried to recover my original comment it was no longer accessible):

Nice article. In my opinion, however, one term stood out like a saw thumb. I refer to your use of 'minaret'.

In the version currently online, we find:

I sit at the window of my room in the Relais de Chambord, a new hotel beside the castle, watching the last of the sun reflect off its pale sandstone, its turrets and domes, towering walls and endless windows.

and the caption:

The castle’s turrets and domes seen from the hotel garden

 These previously read:

I sit at the window of my room in the Relais de Chambord, a new hotel beside the castle, watching the last of the sun reflect off its pale sandstone, its minarets and domes, towering walls and endless windows.

and the caption:

The castle’s minarets and domes seen from the hotel garden

I promptly received the following reply

Tom Robbins, FT Travel Editor said:

Thanks SteveDy. I think it's technically defensible since, according to the Oxford Dictionary, it means "a slender tower". But of course minaret usually relates to mosques, so yes "turret" would be better. I've now updated this piece to that effect. Thanks again

followed a couple of days later by

RuaridhNicoll said:

I defer to my esteemed editor here Steve, but just to explain my thinking, I wrote minaret intentionally because the roofscape was designed to resemble Constantinople. I should have probably said that though! best Ruaridh

Comments:

1. I find the Oxford Dictionary's definition of 'minaret' rather inadequate.
2. I like Ruaridh's use of 'roofscape'.
3. I was fascinated to discover that Ruaridh is a  Scottish name that means 'red king'.
4. I was even more fascinated to discover that the roofscape was designed to resemble Constantinople. What a wonderful titbit of trivia for a dinner party discussion on touring France.
5. Further proof that a terminologist's curiosity often leads to interesting exchanges.

Disruption in the air

No, the headline does not announce another blog post on disruption in the translation industy, just changing views on the word and its cognates.

I take my lead from the (Australian) Radio National program Disrupting the disruptors.
Listen to it here. Or read the transcript here.

Disruption and its cognates are very trendy indeed these days in technical journalism and, as a result, in translations of technical journalism into English.
But journalists and translators who use the word need to know its background and rapidly changing uses and abuses. Disrupting the disruptors will help.

Émilie Du Châtelet remembered

From the Wikipedia entry on Émilie Du Châtelet:

Translation and commentary on Newton's Principia

In 1749, the year of Du Châtelet's death, she completed the work regarded as her outstanding achievement: her translation into French, with her commentary, of Newton’s Philosophiae Naturalis Principia Mathematica (often referred to as simply the Principia), including her derivation of the notion of conservation of energy from its principles of mechanics. Published ten years after her death, today Du Châtelet's translation of the Principia is still the standard translation of the work into French. Indeed, her translation and commentary of the Principia also contributed to the completion of the scientific revolution in France and to its acceptance in Europe.

Et, de la page Wikipédia correspondante en français :

Gabrielle Émilie Le Tonnelier de Breteuil, marquise du Châtelet, communément appelée Émilie du Châtelet, née à Paris le 17 décembre 1706 et morte à Lunéville (Lorraine) le 10 septembre 1749, est une mathématicienne, femme de lettres et physicienne française. Elle est renommée pour la traduction en français des Principia Mathematica de Newton qui fait encore autorité aujourd'hui. Elle-même expérimentatrice, elle a contribué non seulement à populariser en France l'œuvre physique de Leibniz, mais a aussi démontré par l'expérience que l'énergie cinétique (appelée à l'époque « force vive »), était bien proportionnelle, comme il l'avait formulé, à la masse et au carré de la vitesse. Voltaire, avec qui elle entretient une liaison de quinze ans, l'encouragea à poursuivre ses recherches scientifiques.

When a science translator's reputation remains intact for over two hundred years, not to mention the quality of her commentaries on no less an author than Sir Isaac Newton, I think we can say that the lady's achievements are an extraordinary inspiration.

For more, see Voltaire in Love by Nancy Mitford.

Although her name is not directly linked to that of the famous Place du Châtelet right in the centre of Paris, I know I'll think of Émilie Du Châtelet the next time I'm there, and even the next time I'm on a metro that passes through the Place du Châtelet station.